Monday, April 6, 2009

Marriage Monday...Friendship!

Chrysalis says: Scripture teaches us to phileo our husbands (Titus 2:4). This is a human brotherly kind of affection and love. For most men, phileo translates into side-by-side companionship. What do you two love to do together that fosters good feelings between you?

LoverBrain's is truly my friend. We do love to be together...and lately that means when we are very tired. Being the parents of two toddlers is exhausting...and so we are...exhausted! We still enjoy the rare times alone together just side by side. We enjoy watching "Good Eats" together. It's a show that combines my love of cooking and his love of ya have it folks! We enjoy working crossword puzzles together. We enjoy reading together...oddly enough I even count it as romantic...the companionship and quiet of it!

I feel that planned/scheduled date nights are important to our marriage...because it preserves our friendship! When the majority of our time is spent exhausted and scrambling to double team the kids through meals, washings, bedtimes, etc. it seems we lose each other. It is nice to get away for a few hours and reconnect..."Oh yeah, I remember you!" I'm tellin' ya's the best money I've ever budgeted! It's even more fun when he plans the dates...check out my Date Guru!

We share our dreams (figurative and literal) with each other. I love to talk about my future plans. What am I dreaming of doing to the house. Hokey retirement dreams about being like my grandparents and walking early in the morning together. Oooo...I had the weirdest dream last night...and laughing together. Speaking of which...I was talking to Darren about this post...we had a rare Sunday afternoon lunch alone cuz both kids fell asleep in the van on the way home from church... and he was sharing how he actually remembered one of his dreams...I'll share it...
He had a sort of science fiction dream (gotta love my LoverBrains, eh?)...and there were worms eating cows like in Dune and he talked to me in his dream about being upset and freaked out by it and I said something like, "Hey, it's okay they eat things like that all the time in Italy!" HA HA HA...oh that is so funny...cuz I'm totally into exotic foods...LoverBrains, um...not so much! That is totally something I would say to him while watching something squishy being consumed...or whole cows eaten by worms...snort, he he he!

Oh, sigh...*wipe tears from eye corners*...Remember you're friends...Remember why you fell in love...Remember to work on the friendship! Married friendship makes the exhausting times of life bearable! Trust me...zzzzzz!


MiPa said...

Married friendship makes the exhausting times of life bearable!

ABSOLUTELY!! Great post.

Constance said...

I think too many people go into marriage not realizing the amount of hard work it takes!!! Dave and I had rough times, trying to remain connected and we persevered. We are enjoying the benefits of that investment now that we are very nearly empty-nesters with our youngest, Charlie starting college in the Fall.

A part of me is saddened to close that chapter in our life's book. However, I am excited to begin writing our newest chapter, all the much better since we started heavily investing in our relationship about 10 years ago!

e-Mom said...

Hang in there! You'll make it through. You're doing all the right things... like date nights.

Thanks for openly sharing your struggles and your victories in this post. You two are awesome together!

And thanks for joining us for Marriage Monday today, MomE. :~D

Denise said...

Such a nice post.

Sarah Mae said...

I think it's funny what you say about going on husband and I will do the same thing: oh, I remember now why I like you so much! :) I'm being silly, but it is so easy to forget all the reasons you connected when life takes over!

Andrea said...

Looks like your hubby is a great guy! I read about Darren the Date romantic is he???!!! Too cute!

We have young children too and date nights help bring the family focus back to us, where the family begins. After date nights, both of us are refreshed and are eagerly awaiting the next one!

I enjoyed my visit with you today. Thanks for reminding me about the importance of marital friendship!