It's funny that although I find positive reinforcement to be highly effective...I don't discipline myself to use it all the time. Why? Well, because it requires just that discipline...forethought, planning, energy!
"Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid." Proverbs 12:1
How can I teach my children to be disciplined in their character if I myself am not disciplined. AND...loving knowledge, also applying it!
But...this goes much deeper...much greater in importance. Beyond just flat out being a command...
"Discipline your son, for there is hope; do not set your heart on putting him to death."
....yes, beyond the command...Hebrews 12:7 says, "It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline?" This tells me that my discipline of myself and my children teaches a much more important lesson.
The lesson of God the Father's love for His own.
"If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live? For they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, that we may share his holiness. For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it." verses 8-11, emphasis mine!
That's really what I want to teach my children...yes, using Skittles, positive reinforcement, love, kindness...I want to teach them that my love for them is a picture (and sadly poor at best) of God's love for the world...and for them!
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16